Serenity (Forever Book 1) Page 6

I try not to seem nervous. “Yes… thank you for meeting him, Dad.”

  “Well, I need to, if he plans on taking you out on a date.”

  My head snaps up. My heart pounds with the thought that my dad actually cares.

  “Isn’t that how it’s supposed to go?” he heartlessly asks.

  I look back at my plate. Nope. Just following protocol. “Yeah, that’s how it’s supposed to go.”

  I glance at my mom to see if she might be giddy inside. Her daughter is bringing a boy home for the very first time. Josh is in and out of here like a revolving door—when I permit it—but this is different, and she should know this. Jolene does. She’s already texted ten times and called twice.

  Nope, my mom stares out the window facing my front yard, the eggs on her fork getting cold. This is why there was no arguing this morning. Dad doesn’t yell at her in this state. She becomes extremely distracted when she’s about to start drinking again. Her once-radiant skin is now blemished, like her suffering light. She is petite—where I got my stature—but she never used to look so frail, so lost.

  I’ve just finished the dishes when I hear Dad say, “Prince Charming is here.”

  Prince Charming? I look out my front window past the dining table, and a truck I’ve never seen before is driving by. How does my dad know that’s Dereck? Dereck isn’t due for another twenty minutes. I dry my hands on a dish towel and walk out of the kitchen to look out the front sliding-glass doors. That same charcoal-gray crew-cab truck with upgraded tires is now parked in the driveway. My dad was right. Dereck is getting off his cell phone. Through his windshield, his outline gives me butterflies. Just the sight of him is enough to send me spiraling into another realm of consciousness. Knowing he’s here to see me sends me into another hemisphere. Dad studies me, and I stop openly ogling Dereck.

  He rises from his captain’s chair. “Which one is he, again?”

  I stutter, “Which one?”

  I hear his tone…

  “His name!”

  I see his light changing…

  Dad heads to the door. “Let’s get this over with.”

  I know who’s coming…

  Attempting to calm him, I timidly say, “Dereck, Daddy. His name is Dereck.”

  Father slowly turns back to me…

  Father is here…

  Dad goes from the man who ignores me to the sinister man, Father, who wishes to control my every move. Dad’s light goes from murky gray to a living, moving dark mist that consumes his goodness, circling his face. Then the shift I have witnessed many times ripples through his body once again. This is why I prevent friends from visiting. My eyes well. I don’t want this for Dereck. He is kind and doesn’t deserve the beast about to greet him. I stumble to catch up to Father as he plows out the door, passing my mother, who is numbly standing in front of the window, staring at Dereck.

  Walking up the sidewalk, Dereck stops in his tracks. His aura goes from his magnificent white to red—he’s sensing danger. I feel as if I’m suddenly placed on a merry-go-round, spinning around two men preparing to spar, watching them and seeing both differently. I want to pass out but don’t seem to be so lucky.

  Father has always looked menacing and large to me, but up against Dereck, the energy strengths are both powerful. One white and red, the other black and gray.

  Father marches up to him. “She’s only sixteen.”

  Dereck is asking to see me, not marry me. And what does age have to do with this?

  I understand my physical form is standing next to Father as I continue to circle him and Dereck in a mystical sense. “Father! No!”

  “How old are you?” Father asks.

  It’s as if neither Father nor Dereck can focus on anything but reading each other’s energy. They are just answering and asking questions. “Seventeen,” Dereck answers. Again, the age issue baffles me.

  For the first time, Father’s dark cloud reaches out, as if to poke Dereck. Dereck’s light begins to shift into prominent white again.

  My merry-go-round slows. The darkness begins to retreat.

  Father blinks. “Well, I don’t approve of late-night visits.”

  I gasp then think of the security cameras. Father installed them a couple of months ago in the midst of a paranoid tirade.

  Dereck’s light only brightens. And he doesn’t bother asking how Father knew of his visit. “I understand completely, sir. Won’t happen again.”

  Father’s anger starts to dissipate. “Well, uh…It better not.”

  The merry-go-round returns me to my stunned body.

  “If Serenity were my daughter,” Dereck says, “I’d feel the same way. She’s a treasure like no other. And because of that, I can only hope… that you can understand, that to ask me to walk away would be the cruelest thing you could ever ask. Please believe me when I say that I will never show her anything but the utmost respect.” Mist begins to evaporate from Father as Dereck continues. “Give me a chance to prove that my mama raised me right, and I will be a true gentleman if I can spend some time with your daughter. I will respect you and any curfew you give us. But please, please don’t ask me to say goodbye. Not to someone I consider a gift from God.”

  The darkness clears completely. “Um, uh—” Dad swallows then puts his hand out. “I’m Rex.”

  Dereck takes a deep breath and shakes his hand. “I’m Dereck, sir.”

  “I think it’s… nice to meet you, Dereck.”

  “Thank you, sir.”

  Dereck appears to notice my mom still standing inside, looking out the window, her expression empty.

  I don’t know how to explain her catatonic state, so I say, “Uh, that’s my mom, Willow.” Her name suits her—she reminds me of a willow tree. Hanging limbs as if exhausted and sad.

  “Ma’am.” Dereck nods toward the window, probably thinking me and my family are two steps into the Forest of Crazy.

  Dad stutters and says, “I’ll, uh, go check on your mom,” and he walks inside.

  I’m absolutely stupefied. Dad, once in the house, is gently steering my stoic mom from the window.

  “You okay?”

  “Me?” I touch my chest then point. “Don’t you mean you?”

  Dereck inhales deeply and smiles. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know where that came from. My mouth just opened… not that I didn’t mean it, but—”

  I close my eyes so I won’t see his reaction. “This is going to sound weird, but… you are human, right?”

  He bursts out laughing. “Last time I checked, yes.”

  I open my pleading eyes. “Then where are you from?”

  “Uh, here? I’m an Austinian through and through.”

  I finally smile. “Through and through, huh?”

  His smile deepens. “Come ’ere.” He pulls me to him and holds me. “You sure you’re okay?”

  Inhaling him, I certainly am. My arms squeeze. “Much better now, thank you.”

  “Is that what you needed? A hug?”

  My face rubs against him. “I don’t know, but it’s sure doing the trick.”

  “Maybe that’s why Josh is always holding you and Sky.”

  I know why I cling to Josh, his light, but Dereck has made me wonder why Josh embraces me so often. Does he subconsciously know he’s good for me?

  Dereck affectionately grasps my face. “Hey, let’s forget that just happened with your dad and go back to where we started.”

  I tilt my head.

  “Come on.” He takes my hand and leads me back to my swing then leans against the tree trunk. “Take two.”

  I plop into the swing, relieved this guy knows how to handle me. But somehow, that gets me thinking of how my dad doesn’t anymore. He once loved me dearly, and now he hates me. I think of how he changed with th
e drugs. How drugs entered our lives, soon followed by an unexplainable dark gloom that became our appendage. The cloaked one says certain drugs can make a person susceptible to change. They certainly did that with my father.

  This something appeared when I was eight and took over my seemingly blissful world. I was too young to understand that it was truly neglect. Then part of the darkness broke away and attached itself to Dad. Just a little girl, I huddled by the Christmas tree glowing in the front of my house. The sliding-glass door exposed what no one but I could see. There was no waking from my true, living nightmare—my reality for years to come. The mist took hold, and my daddy morphed into a beast. When the darkness takes a hiatus every now and then, my daddy doesn’t return. Only Dad. And he simply becomes a cold, nonnurturing, empty man. What just transpired with Dereck was the closest to human I’ve seen my dad in years.

  Mommy was soon replaced by an empty shell that no longer lived for my hugs and kisses. Her smile for me faded, never to return. My healthy parents popped one too many pills and were replaced by selfish strangers, right before my eyes. That’s the hardest part to swallow. Even though far from perfect role models before the drugs became more intense, they still had given me tender memories. That makes me know what I’ve been missing. This knowledge leaves a gaping hole in my heart.

  My name? Serenity—a cruel joke that couldn’t be further from my truth. Although, my mom has paid the heaviest price for this awful change.

  “Where are you?” Patiently, Dereck waits for my reply.

  I glance at my home. His eyes follow. I look back at him. His eyes follow.

  “I guess… I’m trying to find my way?”

  With no judgment, he appears sorrowful, as if he already knows I have secrets.

  “Dereck, letting you in seems so easy yet scary at the same time.”

  He swiftly kneels in front of me. “I feel the same. To surrender to you—how I feel for you—well, I’ve never been so exposed.”

  My breathing quickens. He does understand. “Dereck?” His hands reach for mine. I stare at his strong fingers, loving how it feels to touch him like this. “I’m fighting—” I peer back at my house. I want to tell him. I’ve never wanted to share my secrets with anyone, but then something inside me shuts down. I don’t know how to speak the unspeakable. “I’m fighting someone else’s battle.” My eyes look at the ground in defeat. I want to tell you.

  “Whether you win or lose that battle, Serenity, you still have a chance at winning the war.” I gaze back up. He nods. “Never give up.” Then he whispers, “Never.”

  I believe I have three angels in my life, now—Sky, the cloaked one, and Dereck.

  My tears say more than my words. “Thank you for coming when you did, Dereck.”

  My room is small compared to this beautiful, spacious house. But it has the best view from the second floor, tucked away in the back of my home. On my balcony—my sanctuary—Sky and I sit on the wicker couch, both staring into the dark night. Considering how close I am to Sky, it’s surprising that I have managed to keep details of my often-nightly struggles from her. But it’s necessary to spare her the agony of the truth. She saw my mom drunk once and paled so drastically, I vowed to never let her witness it again. Now, when she wants to stay the night, I touch my nose if the coast isn’t clear. She nods and says, “Maybe tomorrow.”

  Besides, nothing can be done about my predicament, and Skyler has enough on her plate. Years ago, our young ears picked up on enough adult conversation to figure out that Sky’s father’s “vacation” was a twenty-year prison sentence for drug trafficking. This left Sky’s mom in a big, expensive home with little income. Our parents’ parties came crashing to an end with much finger-pointing.

  Within months, Skyler’s mom had a new boyfriend who moved into their home. I never forgot the first time Sky pulled me from her bed in the middle of the night and hid us both in her closet. Her light burned so red—lighting the whole closet—that I worried for her sanity. We sat there only a moment before I heard what we were hiding from. Her older sisters’ screams were gut wrenching as they cried out for their mom as a man yelled in a drunken rage. From my own experiences, I recognized the thumps and bumps that echoed through the walls. Skyler closed her eyes and covered her ears as she rocked herself into a disturbing blank stare. My body rocked with hers as I held her.

  Our bond deepened.

  Once we met Jolene, Sky and I discussed sharing our home lives with her but decided not to bring her unnecessary trouble. She would only worry herself sick because she is powerless to help us.

  Now these two little girls huddle in the dark again. But this time I’m happy. I snuggle under our blanket. “I have a wild feeling running through me.”

  “I know. I can feel it.”

  Skyler is an extension of me. Josh and Jolene find it fascinating. Sky and I find it… being whole. “I think I’m falling for him.”

  “I think you already fell, my sweet.”

  “I’m taking him to the spring tomorrow.”

  “Yep, you’ve fallen.”

  “I’m trying to play hard to get.”

  “Liar.”

  The spring is my safest place. Skyler knows my decision to take Dereck there is serious. “Sky, do you think he’ll kiss me?”

  “I bet ten bucks your knees will buckle.”

  “What? Make it twenty. I can handle myself.”

  Just then, Dereck’s guitar ringtone goes off in my lap, spooking me into throwing the cell phone into the air.

  Skyler watches me fumble to retrieve the device. “That twenty is like taking candy from a baby.”

  “Shut up!” I laugh. She’s so right. “Hello?”

  “Hey, still awake?”

  “I am. Just sitting here with Sky.” I try to act calm and collected. Not like the spaz I just was.

  “Talking to you today was… quite peaceful. I felt I should tell you that.”

  My shoulders relax, and I melt into Sky. “I feel the same.”

  She whispers, “Candy from a baby.”

  “I hear Sky needing ya. I won’t keep you. I just… Serenity, I can’t wait to see you tomorrow.”

  I inhale. “Me, either.”

  “Good night.”

  “Good night, Dereck.”

  Sitting alone, peacefully, in the flower field, I listen for her hum. This time the cloak blows over me as her greeting when my dream mate arrives. “She feels familiar to me.” The cloaked one sits next to me.

  “You feel Sky’s presence?” Skyler isn’t in my dream. She’s resting next to me in my bed.

  The cloaked one’s hooded face stares at the flowers. “Sky.” She inhales. “Yes, she warms my heart.”

  I whisper, “Me, too,” completely moved that this being recognizes my best friend.

  Her shoulder leans to mine. “There is much to come.”

  She’s right. I can feel it. “And not all good?”

  “Change is always good, no matter what form it takes.”

  Chapter Seven

  Dysfunctional Ways

  The calm before the storm, from within I am torn

  Leaping with faith, hoping not a mistake.

  Sitting in bed with my journal in my lap, I wonder, is Dereck my calm or my storm? Or is my mother, looking for her escape, my storm? I see it in her eyes. She’s ready to run to the bottle again.

  Sky and I spend the morning together. Sitting on my bed, she brushes my hair. I love it, and she knows it. That’s why she takes her time through every long stroke. “Keep your jean shorts on today.”

  “The bruise is that bad?” The river trip has left a mark.

  Skyler finishes putting my hair in a ponytail then kisses my cheek. “Not that he would notice with you in a bikini.”

  She removes my
journal from my bed and goes to my closet. After lifting the loose board, she slips the journal into its safe hiding place. Then she grabs my hand, and we head downstairs to hear, “Oh goody, Prince Charming has arrived.”

  Sky raises a brow as we stand on the last step.

  I roll my eyes, then I ask Dad, “Would you like him to come in and say hello?”

  “Can do without.”

  Dereck gets to my front door just as Sky and I open it. We pop out and shut it quickly, leaving my dad to his miserable mood.

  “Ah, the Shorties have extra pep in their step this morning. Sky, did ya change your mind?”

  “Nope. It’s just you and Serenity today.”

  I can’t stop smiling at him. I know this is going to be a great day.

  “Should I say hello to your parents?”

  Skyler mumbles, “Only if you feel like being abused.”

  “Not particularly,” he answers. “Skyler, want a lift home?”

  She kisses my cheek. “Have fun, my sweet.” Then she walks backward down my long driveway. “No, thanks, Dereck. Serenity and I always walk. Gotta keep our figures. Right, Prince Charming?”

  “Prince Charming?”

  Almost to our road, she winks over her shoulder. Once she reaches the end of my driveway, she takes a right and heads home.

  Dereck faces me. “Ya ready?”

  I reach for his hand that I’ve wanted to hold all day. “Yep.” And I pull him toward my backyard.

  He hesitantly follows. “Serenity, tell me this spring is not right behind your house.”

  “No, it’s a little walk. Sky and I found it when we were younger. Showed Jolene. Eventually Josh, and now… you.” I glance to see if he understands.

  Slightly, he bows his head. “I’m honored.”

  Leaving my yard behind, we enter the woods. Between the canopies of trees, the sun finds us every time it can. I love feeling the warmth throughout my body. This is my first chance to be alone with Dereck. No Crew. No parents. I plan on taking advantage of it. I want to learn everything about him in this lifetime. “Okay, Dereck. Q and A time.”